Don't find x, don't solve for y, and don't approach infinity

Dear Math, 
Stop asking us to find your X. She's not coming back, and you need to move on. Why not ask Z out for coffee?

Dear Algebra,
I will no longer solve for Y. Why is it that I am the one who is always supposed to pick up pieces of Y's disasters? Let Y solve his own damned problems.

Dear Calculus,
Thank you, no. I will not take a second derivative. The first one filled my up quit nicely.

Dear Math,
Stop trying to normalize the matrix. Has it ever occurred to you that the matrix might like who he is, and doesn't want to be normalized?

Dear Riemann,
No, you let n approach infinity. Infinity is an arrogant bastard, and I will not be part of this introduction.

Dear Division,
You want me to find you another common denominator? What did you do with the last ones I found you?